Mishima Family Vacation
by D.A.R.E to Feel Good
Summary: Kazuya, Heihachi and Jin all go on a family vacation to try and bond. We know this is never going to work so this fic is full of randomness! Rated T due to mild swearing, sexual references yay and possible violence.
1. The Car Trip

**Chapter 1**

The jet black Chevrolet cruised down the highway at an incredible rate swerving side to side dodging cars and switching lanes with no indication. Drivers held up rude gestures but the one driving didn't care. Neither did any of the unfortunate passengers. This was the Mishima family car.

"Remind me again why the hell we are doing this?" Kazuya asked in the front passenger seat.

Heihachi, the driver, frowned and glanced over his shoulder to make sure his middle finger was seen by the car behind him and then replied "Our family therapist told us that we should do some bonding and what better than a holiday in a nice hotel next to a beach with swimming pools, a karate dojo, carnivals, theme parks, candy floss, cheese, chocolate… Oh! And cake! Everybody loves cake."

Kazuya sighed "You can get cake anywhere!"

Heihachi pulled hard on the wheel making the car skid left "Well you were outvoted."

Jin's head popped up from the middle back seat "Yeah, so stop being all broody." He then sat back down bashing the buttons on his PSP.

Kazuya rubbed at his temple and rested his head on the glass of the car window "Stupid son…" he mumbled to himself.

As the car swerved dangerously, everyone in the car didn't seem to notice and moved with it like it was the normal action for a car to do. Heihachi, being such an intimidating guy financially and physically, was never pulled over by police or given tickets. Apart from a few years ago when he parked near a fire hydrant and some random person came, tsked-tsked and received a punch in the face instantly knocking him out cold and it sent him hurtling into a brick wall. And that was the only time Heihachi was criticized for his parking/driving.

"DIE YOU ASS!" Jin cried out jumping up and down on his seat playing Tekken on his PSP.

Kazuya turned to face him and saw that Jin was playing as himself against… Well… Against Jin. Confused and a little scared Kazuya turned back and didn't ask questions.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! I DIED!" Jin screeched even louder making Heihachi wince and retaliate by flicking Kazuya's seat back so that it crushed his annoying grandson and in addition, causing his son to fly backwards.

Jin flailed about, his cries muffled by the leather chair. Kazuya shook his head and was about to fix his seat and give his father a punch in the face but realized that Jin was in pain and decided to relax.

With immense effort, Jin pushed the seat up a little using his legs but the force was already causing them to shake "Hey! What was that for!?"

Heihachi smirked "Oh nothing." He then turned to face Jin "You're just a dumbass." Kazuya grinned at this.

Heihachi glared at him "You are too." Kazuya responded by readjusting his seat and sliding lower in it with his arms folded muttering crude words.

"Why am I a dumbass?" Jin asked sitting up and rubbing his right shoulder.

Heihachi looked at him like he had just recited the welsh national anthem while dressed in a hula skirt and dancing the Macarena while juggling different types of Italian pasta and making it rain spaghetti "Because you just fought yourself-"

"And lost" Kazuya added.

Heihachi nodded then continued "and called yourself an ass… And I thought Kazuya had problems."

Kazuya and Jin frowned that frown they shared through blood and became quiet. Well, Kazuya was quiet anyway. Jin started leaning on the front seat's headrests humming "Summer Holiday".

"I thought this was supposed to be a family vacation with no rows, fights, swearing, throwing each other off cliffs or into volcanoes or betraying each other and then seeking vengeance through gruelling training and beating up innocent people." Kazuya stated after a few moments.

"Yes. It is. Doesn't mean we won't have a bit of a tiff now and then, though." Heihachi replied. He then said to both "And no morphing into devils to create destruction and chaos using the Mishima Zaibatsu as a main control point in order to take over the world."

"What!?" Kazuya and Jin replied simultaneously.

"But you never let me do that!" Kazuya added rather childishly.

"Aww man. I was looking forward to exploiting the Mishima Zaibatsu in order to take over the world…"Jin muttered

Heihachi sighed "I know… maybe when we get back."

"YAY!" The other two shouted. Jin started jumping up and down happily but Kazuya quickly realized how childish he was only a few seconds ago and regained his broody posture.

Suddenly, Jin's mobile phone rang playing "Barbie Girl". Kazuya and Heihachi turned to face Jin who started sweating and laughed worriedly "Uh… It's the ringing tone I chose so I know it's Xiaoyu ringing me!" he reached into his pocket pulling out a nice yellow and black Nokia with a cool swivel feature, blutooth, infrared, headset, 3 megapixels and lots of other bollocks nobody understands.

"Hi…………No It's not a bad time………. I'm going on vacation…….No……….No……….Yes…….No……….With my family……….What?...I can't call you that now……..It's embarrassing………My dad and grandpa are in the car….alright alright!...I love you baby……..Yes………..Of course I do………..Yeah I can't stop thinking about that too…….Hehe…. Yeah it was fun……………Oh I totally forgot about that!...Oh my god! I know!... She totally walked in on us!...Look I know it was your first time……But I have experience…….I know it was big and it looked like it wouldn't fit……But it did….. I know it went in the wrong hole and was meant to go in the front one……….. Yeah, why did you put it in your mouth?...Oh okay……..really? I gotta try that sometime!...Alright baby………I have to go anyway, my grandpa has just been sick all over my dad……..aww thanks baby………….sure……….will do………bye honeybunny………..okay………bye…………..yes………..byebye………..alright bye now!...bye!" he hung up just before Xiaoyu would start screaming that she loves him down the phone.

Heihachi pulled the car over and stumbled out clutching his stomach followed by Kazuya who cursed loudly making passerby's noses bleed from the depth of his crude words even though they sped past. He ripped his shirt off and tossed it aside not noticing the freezing cold air.

Jin hopped out of the car pulling his hood up "Wow, it's freezing out here!" He peered at Kazuya's vomit stained clothes and then inside the car "Good thing none of it got in the car!"

Kazuya grabbed him by his shirt front "You think this is funny!?"

Jin thought a bit and then replied "Yeah, pretty much." He landed on the ground with a thud as Kazuya dropped him and went around to the boot of the car and tore apart the contents looking for another set of clothes.

Heihachi stood and glared at Jin "What were you thinking!? Talking about… That kind of thing!?"

Jin frowned "What kind of thing? Nothing wrong with discussing how to hook up an Xbox, is there? Those things are hell!"

"An Xbox?" Heihachi stuttered "Oh… Well then… I guess it was your father's cooking that blew my gut upwards."

Kazuya peered around from the back "I only cooked because that idiot dared me to" He pointed to Jin.

"Yes but that could've killed me! The least you might of done was actually TURN the microwave on!"

"Kill you with your iron stomach? No way!" Jin laughed but then backed away from Heihachi's glare.

"I would have done so if Jin hadn't blown it up by using a manual for a Toaster as a guide to hooking it up. Anyway, if I didn't go along with the dare, he would've…" He shook his head "Never mind."

Heihachi looked to Jin who said "I'll tell you later."

After Kazuya changed into his purple suit and Heihachi had calmed his raging stomach, the three sat back in the car and continued the journey.

Half an hour into it, Jin awoke from his sleep because he's such a lazy ass he couldn't even stay awake on the five hour trip. The stench of uncooked cabbage and chicken had gone which is what probably made him pass out in the first place. His father was wearing his favourite pair of gloves (the awesome red ones with the silver balls in the shape of a triangle on it) and was fiddling with them clenching and unclenching his fists. Heihachi was leaning back in his chair, his hands behind his head and using his feet to drive.

"How long was I out?" Jin asked stretching and yawning.

"Not long enough." Kazuya said without looking back and making a fist.

Jin was bored. He started tapping out a tune on the leather seat while looking around for some means of entertainment. He then found a good beat with his tapping and jazzed it up a bit, nodding his head to the rhythm and adding DJ sounds with his mouth.

Kazuya clenched his teeth and his fists started to shake. Heihachi slapped him around the head in order abolish Kazuya's desire to kill.

"Jin." Heihachi said in a menacing tone. But he didn't stop "Jin… Jin!...JIN!!!"

"What!? What!?" Jin shouted.

"Stop being annoying."

"fine…" Jin now had to think of another thing to do. He held up his hand and spread his fingers wide. He placed his other index finger on his pinky and said "Bunny" he went onto the next and then the next "Bunny. Bunny. Bunny." And when it came to the dip between his left hand's index finger and thumb he traced it down saying "Oops." And landed on his thumb saying "Bunny." And then went back up "Oops." And continued with the other fingers at a fast speed. "Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Oops! Bunny. Oops! Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Oops! Bunny. Oops! Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Oops! Bunny. Oops! Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Bunny. Oops! Bunny. Oops!" and so on and so forth.

Kazuya's red eye started twitching and he stared at the front of the car blankly trying to process the stupidity that was his son.

"Jin…" Heihachi warned again "Jin… Stop it… Jin! JIN! JJJJJJJJJJJJIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP IT YOU LITTLE BUGGER OR I'LL KILL YOU!" Heihachi dived into the back seat (ripping his seat belt) leaving Kazuya to control the car while leaning across from his own seat.

Jin screamed a girly scream and scrambled around the back trying to escape the bone-crunching hands that belonged to his grandfather "DAD! GRANDPA IS TRYING TO KILL MEEEEEE!"

"Yeah, I know." Kazuya then turned briefly "Great isn't it?" he grinned.

"I'M GOING TO SIT ON YOU!" Heihachi threatened.

"NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!" Jin cried "I'll do anything! Please don't sit on me!"

Heihachi calmed "Will you stop being such a dumbass then?"

Jin nodded tears welling up in his eyes making small whimpering noises. Heihachi nodded, pleased with his power and authority and climbed back into his seat and took control of the car "It's easy to tell you're Kazuya's spawn…" he mumbled under his breath.

Kazuya glared at him but then turned to look out of his window _Why am I tortured so?_ He thought.

"Are we nearly there yet?" Jin asked after quickly regaining his courage to be annoying again.

"No." Heihachi replied.

"Daddy?"

Kazuya grunted.

"Are we nearly there yet?"

"I said no!" Heihachi snapped.

Jin backed down like a kicked puppy "I was only asking… But if we're not there then where are we? We have to be somewhere."

"God give me strength!" Heihachi cried banging the steering wheel.

"We are on the motorway so shut up." Kazuya said almost venomously.

"Okay…" Jin said and a few moments later "But a motorway isn't a place. It's a thing."

Kazuya ripped out the glove compartment in front of him and threw Jin a pen and a crossword book.

"Crosswords?" Jin questioned almost sarcastically.

"Yes crosswords." Kazuya said "That will keep you busy."

Jin frowned at his father and then flipped open the book and started on one. After scratching his head sighing, scribbling, whining and grunts of frustration he finally decided to ask for help "Can you guys help me?"

"Kazuya?" Heihachi said as if passing the burden onto him.

"Can't talk, brain switched off, in ignoring mode." Kazuya replied eyes closed leaning on the window.

Heihachi sighed "Fine. Which one are you on?"

"The first one." Jin said ready to write with the pen.

Heihachi growled quietly "Alright, what's the clue?"

"Um… Five across… Clue is Canine breed."

"Try… Dog."

"Okay… There isn't enough letters!"

"You'll have to spell it wrong!"

"Alright… Um… V…Z...K…B…X"

"And?" Heihachi said impatiently.

"We have Vzkbx! So now six down… The clue is Bird… Now begins with 'Z'"

"A six letter bird name beginning with Z?" Heihachi frowned.

"I GOT IT!" Jin cried out "Zebra Bird!"

"Don't be stupid………… There are too many letters…"

"Well I'll spell it wrong like Vzkbx!" Jin suggested eagerly.

"Go on then!"

"But then… The next one would be eleven letters, clue is Pterosaur, now begins with Q!"

"Fine! Rub it out and back to the first one!"

"Alright…"

Heihachi sighed and scratched his head but then leapt up, almost out of his seat "I know! Cindy!"

"Cindy?" Jin moved back in his seat, freaked by his grandfather's sudden enthusiasm.

"You know… Cindy the dog! She was that dog Kazuya had that I flushed down the toilet!"

"Oh yeah! Great thinking! Oh… Hang on. Cindy only has four letters."

"Well you could make the 'C' really big so it would fill out the first two squares!"

"Good idea!... Well there's no room for the Y!" Jin was increasingly confused.

"God! Who writes these things! How are we meant to do a crossword if the words don't fit the box thingies!?" Heihachi said frustrated,

"I think I'll just stab it repeatedly with this pen."

"Now, now, Jin. Play properly or not at all."  
Jin ripped the book, scrunched it up, and threw it "Fine then, not at all!" The paper bounced off the dashboard and hit Kazuya in the head.

He opened his eyes and looked down at the scrunched up crossword book and sighed "Jin… Another one?" He threw out the window.

"Well they are hard!" Jin replied now sulking "Grandpa gave me all the wrong answers!"

Heihachi looked hurt "I was trying just as much as you were!"

"Yeah well…" Jin searched for an insult "I think… I THINK YOUR HEAD IS BEEFY!"

Heihachi sniffed and wiped his eye with his hand "I don't think so…" He rubbed his head and turned to Kazuya "Kazuya… You don't think my head is… Beefy… Do you?"

Kazuya raised an eyebrow and didn't reply.

Heihachi sniffed again and started poking his head while looking in the rear-view mirror. Then he realized all he could see in that mirror was Jin's rear "What the hell, Jin!?"

Jin laughed hysterically "Get it? REAR-view mirror? I crack myself up!"

"Jin, if you don't sit down I'm going to insert Heihachi's head into your rear and it will be most painful and unpleasant." Kazuya said expressionless and unmoving.

Jin gulped and slowly sat back down. Then he curled up in a ball, traumatized by the thought of having his grandfather's head half-way up his posterior. The more he thought about it the more frequent his spasms came and he kept twitching and whimpering.

"Ha! Good joke, Kazuya!" Heihachi laughed and was about to pat his son on the back when he received a cold glare that showed Kazuya was not joking. Heihachi started to sweat. He cleared his throat and put both hands on the steering wheel.

Kazuya smirked at the fear he had put into the others but this soon went away when he realized there was a pigeon smeared across his window. Well, what he could see of it. The head had come off and slowly slid across the car window until it came to Jin's window and, due to a gum accident he had had before with the outside of that window, it became stuck and Jin slowly turned to see a pigeon head staring back at him.

"AAAAAHHHHHH! PIGEON HEAD! IT'S GONNA EAT ME!" Jin screeched leaping into the front and landing on Kazuya's lap and squeezing him in a tight hug. Jin shivered and cried but he opened one eye and saw the rest of the pigeon on the window "AAAAAAAHHHHH! PIGEON GUTS!" he screamed in his dad's ear and jumped across onto Heihachi and wrapped himself around his head "SAVE ME!"

"Jin! GET OFF MY HEAD!" Heihachi shouted muffled by Jin's arm. He was now driving with his grandson latched to his head and one of his arms was wrapped across his mouth so he bit it. Jin yelped and Kazuya pushed him back into the backseats.

Jin scrambled to one side of the car to get as far away from the pigeon head as possible.

Knowing it was his father's car, Kazuya smiled evilly and reached back behind his seat to press the window button. When he did, Jin watched the window wind down taking the pigeon head with it and then a crunching noise was heard and the head disappeared and when the window came back up, all that was left was a smear of blood and an eye (what was left of it). Kazuya did the same with his window only it left more than a smear of blood (a foot, feathers, intestine, a lung and part of the heart). He glanced briefly at his son "See? The big bad pigeon is all gone… Well, most of it anyway."

Heihachi realized what Kazuya had done and that he had bits of pigeon in the cracks of the windows and over one side of his car "Kazuya! THIS WAS ONE OF MY FAVOURITE CARS!!!!" the anger left him and then he started to pout "My car…"

Finally, a long while after the pigeon incident, the car pulled into the hotel parking area and Heihachi paid this guy to wash his car after it had gotten many strange looks from passers-by.

"What happened to your car, sir?" The man asked seeing the blood and bits of barbed-wire and fence sticking out of it in various places and not to mention the front of it was all scuffed and dented.

"Hehe… I hit a dog." Heihachi replied thinking it was a good excuse. He turned and picked up his bags and was followed by Kazuya and Jin.

"You hit a dog?" Kazuya questioned.

"What was I supposed to say? Jin really had to urinate but there was no where and then he got impatient, grabbed the wheel and drove us into a farm where we collided with various things naming, fences, hay stacks, a variety of wild fowl, a sheep, that barbed wire fence where we entered the cow paddock, a goat, and then we crashed into a cow that knocked us back but it didn't even move then it just looked at us and walked along it's merry way!?"

Kazuya thought for a second and then saw his father's point of view "I guess you're right… But how is a dog going to cause all that damage to a car?"

"… It was that dog out of that film Beethoven." Heihachi said.

"So what floor are we?" Jin asked looking up at the billion million story hotel.

Heihachi smiled "The top one."

And so, with immense hesitation, they began their ascent.

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Yay for my first tekken fanfic! If you don't get anything please just say and I'll explain. Thanks for reading! Chpater 2 should be up soon! (can't guarantee anything though :P)


	2. The Acent of DOOM!

**Chapter 2**

"I'm tired! I'm hungry!" Jin moaned after only just starting to climb up the stairs to the top of the billion million story hotel. They had attempted to use the elevator but when Heihachi stepped in, they could hear the sound of cable snapping from above so they decided to take the stairs to be safe "I'm thirsty! Stop walking so fast!"

Kazuya was in front of Jin and was thinking of all the ways he could cause extreme pain to his son. Heihachi was in front and had shoved cotton into his ears to stop Jin's whining from leaking through.

"Are we there yet?" Jin continued "Are we there yet? Because if we aren't there and we aren't where we started then where are we? Hang on… I already asked this in the previous chapter… Anyway. Dad, are we there yet?"

"No" Kazuya replied.

"Are we there yet?"

"No"

"Are we there yet?"

"No"

"Are we there yet?"

"No"

"Are we there yet?"

"No"

"…"

"No"

"I didn't say anything!" Jin stated.

Kazuya turned briefly "I was saying it in advance."

Jin frowned but then nodded "Ah, I see your point… Are we there yet?"

"FOR GOD SAKES JIN! SHUT UP!" Heihachi's bellow echoed through the hotel causing the picture frames to shake and one fell from a great height and crashed into Kazuya head-on and it was one of those thick-bordered ones that were reaaaaaaaaalllllllyyyyyyy heavy.

Kazuya looked up at Heihachi and mumbled "I hate you." Before stumbling and crashing past Jin (who carefully slid to one side to make room for his father's fall) and down a few steps.

Jin waddled over to him and started poking his face "Daddy? Hello………… Wake up, sleepy head…"

Heihachi sighed "Great, now dumbass is out cold and we have to carry him up…"

Jin pushed Kazuya's cheeks together and made it look like he was talking and added his impression of what he sounded like "I'm Kazuya and I wear pink undies with frilly bits and I like little ponies and when I was little I used to pretend I was a pretty fairy and used my dad's walking stick as a magic wand."

Heihachi looked surprised "How do you know about my walking stick?"

Jin ignored him and continued "I think my son Jin is the coolest because he's so hot and sexy. I'm surprised I'm his dad because my face looks like a monkey butt! And this one time I took my mum's bra and danced to Spice Girls in front of a mirror and-"

"Ooookkaaay… That's enough…" Heihachi said Picking Jin up in one arm and Kazuya in the other.

"Hey beefhead! Put me down!" Jin protested.

"My head is not beefy! Neither am I made of beef…" Heihachi said sulkily. Suddenly only a few seconds later he heard Jin snoring. He would have left it like that if it wasn't for Jin's drool that slid down his back "Ugh…" He shook Jin awake.

"No mum, I didn't do pee-pee…" Jin said as he woke up.

Heihachi ignored his remark "So, Jin… Where did you get all that stuff about Kazuya?"

Jin chuckled evilly "Turns out even Kazuya has a diary!"

"A diary, eh? Hehe… How girly…" Heihachi muttered thinking about his own diary (pink and furry with Barbie written on it) "So what else was in it?"

"Well, apparently, about a billion squillion years ago when you were a little younger-"

Heihachi grunted at this insult but let Jin continue.

"Before you got home from work i.e. spending hours taste-testing every fast-food place, Kazuya would make you some green tea, right?"

"Yeah, the best I've ever had." Heihachi grinned.

"Well, what made it soooo nice was the fact that he added a whole bottle of _laxative_."

Heihachi stopped walking "… So that's why my bed blankets were incinerated when I went to bed… Cost me a fortune that did…" he started up the stairs again "C'mon, give me something good!"

Jin smiled at the challenge "Alright, then… His favourite TV show was, and still is, Power Puff Girls, he likes tofu, he thinks Purple is a macho colour, he likes bunnies, he wanted to be in Destiny's Child but now thinks he should sing for Girls Aloud, he decorates his diary with pink ponies, he wears his underwear inside-out, he think Pokemon are cool, he likes lacy things, he dreams of dancing with Celine Dion so he can sing that Titanic song, he wants to sing in West Life, he-"

Heihachi shook his head "Jin. You were lying weren't you?"

Jin went quiet.

"Kazuya doesn't really have a diary, does he? All that is in _your_ diary!"

"What!? How do you know!?" Jin screeched.

Heihachi dropped Jin on the floor and pulled out a Bratz diary and waved it in front of Jin's face "I know more then you think I do!" He put it back in his coat pocket when Jin tried to grab it.

"How did you get that!? It's mine! Gimme!" Jin started slapping Heihachi repeatedly (like bitch fighting).

"Ow!? What the-OW!" Heihachi cried out and made a runner up the rest of the stairs. However, Jin grabbed onto his leg and all of them went flying and lay sprawled out on the floor.

Kazuya woke up and rubbed his head "What happened?" he turned to see Jin pinning Heihachi on the ground threatening to spit on him. A long string of spit dripped slowly out of Jin's mouth and he sucked it back up inches away from Heihachi's face.

"No! I'll do anything! Not Spitties!" Heihachi pleaded.

"Gimme my diary!" Jin demanded. He snatched it from Heihachi's hands and started rocking it in his arms.

"Why did I agree to do this stupid vacation!?" Kazuya cried "I'm wasting away with you two idiots. I can already feel my brain deteriorating!"

"Pika pika!" A voice came from a few steps above them. They all looked up and saw… A pretty pissed off Pikachu.

Everyone went silent and then Jin screamed a high-pitch girly squeal "OMFG MAN! IT'S A PIKACHU!"

"Are those things real?" Heihachi asked Kazuya pointing at the Pikachu while Jin jumped up and down in excitement.

"We are in the Author's story. Anything can happen." Kazuya stated solemnly.

Heihachi looked up and then back at the Pikachu "If this is true… We're screwed."

"Pi pikachu." The Pikachu replied seemingly agreeing "Pika pika chu? pi pi pika pikachu!?" it said after a few moments of silence with a clearly angry tone.

Heihachi raised an eyebrow "What?"

Jin sighed "Look, gramps," he started and leaned on his grandfather's shoulder "Pikachu says what's wrong with Pokemon? You wanna make something of it!?"

Kazuya shook his head "God I can't believe this… This story is so stupid."

"Pi pika chu pikachu?"

Jin translated "It says who here has a problem with Pokemon?" Jin looked at Heihachi and then to Kazuya "These two do. They think you suck."

"What!?" Heihachi cried while Kazuya glared daggers at Jin.

"Pika pika?" it said hopping down a few steps.

"Is this true?" Jin translated.

"Well… I have nothing against them…" Heihachi said.

Kazuya smiled "I think they suck."

Suddenly, with no warning, the Pikachu dived at Kazuya and latched onto his face.

"Ah! My face! Get it off!" He cried while flailing about and pulling at the Pikachu.

Jin screamed "NO! ITS EATING DADDY'S FACE!" Him and Heihachi grabbed at it and wrestled with it trying to pry it from Kazuya's face. Eventually, it let go and Heihachi threw it into a wall but it landed on it and bounced off making another attack.

Kazuya glared at it and readied an uppercut. He waited for the time to strike and when it came… He turned and ran away like a girl… Oops, no wait, sorry, no he didn't run away like a girl. That's what Jin would've done.

Jin: Hey!

What?

Jin: No I wouldn't!

Wouldn't what?

Jin: Run away like a girl!

You would

Jin: Would not!

WOULD!

Jin: Would not!!

DON'T ARGUE WITH ME MISTER, GET BACK IN THE STORY!!!!!!!

Jin: pouts

Anyway… Kazuya waited for the time to strike and when it came…

Jin: You really didn't have to shout like that! You hurt my feelings!

AAARRRGHH! God you are annoying… I'll make Heihachi sit on you in the next chapter if you're not careful…

Jin: S-s-s-it on m-me!?

Yes. And we all know that it's easy to get lost in there.

Heihachi: Now I resent that remark-

AH! GET BACK IN THE STORY BEFORE I RIP YOUR HEAD OFF!

Kazuya: Can we get on with it?

drools um, yeah okay, sure lets get on with the story! watches Kazuya's ass

Kazuya: --"

ahem Anyway… Kazuya waited for the time to strike and when it came… Hey, no one's going to interrupt me? Yay! Thanks guys I was bracing myself for an interruption there! Hehe, cool. Thanks. you guys don't suck after all! Apart from Kazuya… You never suck ;-

Heihachi: I can't work like this…

Jin: Yeah! I'm going on strike!

WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! NO GO GO ON STRIKEY! I'll continue, I swear! Okay? We cool?

Heihachi and Jin: Yeah… Okay…

Alright then. Kazuya waited for the time to strike and when it came… The Pikachu was sent hurtling into the air and landed on Heihachi's head with a thud. But, his head being beefy. The Pikachu slid off and fell down the stairs.

"Yay! Daddy killed it!" Jin ran over and crushed Kazuya in a hug.

Kazuya started twitching and then shaking. Heihachi pulled Jin off and had to push Kazuya to make him move from his traumatized state. They wandered all the rest of the way up. Growing ever so tired.

Finally, upon reaching the top, Jin was on his knees, crawling and out of breath "I… Can't… Make it… Lights fading… Toes… Numb… Grandpa! Dad!... Go on without me!"

Heihachi and Kazuya walked past and stood on the landing waiting for Jin to realize they were there.

"Oh." Jin said and jumped up.

"How much did you pay for this bedroom?" Kazuya asked folding his arms and looking at the shiney door that they would open to enter their room.

Heihachi laughed "I'm the leader of the Mishima Zaibatsu! I had to pay nothing!"

Kazuya looked at him "How many beds? There are three, right?"

Heihachi looked down at his feet and mumbled "well you could say it that way."

Kazuya gulped and repeated "How many beds?"

"One…"

Kazuya's eyes widened and his pupils dilated "O-o-one… ONE!?"

Heihachi nodded solemnly.

Jin squealed in delight and jumped in between them both squeezing them in a huge hug "Isn't this great dad!? We all get to share a bed! It'll be like a sleepover!"

"This isn't happening… This is NOT happening…" Kazuya repeated.

Heihachi sighed "The first stage is always denial, son…"

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Yay! Chappie 2! Next one to be up soon I hope! does a little dance but gets thrown a fish I hate fish! EEWW! Thanks for reading! Chapter 3 will be up soon I hope!


	3. Fatherson Therapy

**Chapter 3**

The three entered the huge bedroom. The view was fantastic complete with a Do It Yourself bungee cord attached to one of the windowpanes for optional high-thrill experiences. The wardrobes were enormous so Kazuya could fit in all forty-four purple suits he owned and still have enough room for other clothes as well. The bed was gigantic sized but no one could be sure if there would be enough room with Heihachi in it. The bedside tables had lots of space to put beer, beer and more beer (or lots of brandy-topped cognac glasses in Kazuya's case). The carpet was a nice dark green, which is one big reason Heihachi wanted the room because he likes green… green is good. The wallpaper was white with decorative blue stripes equally spaced out with lacy flowers on them just like Jin would like. It had an en suite bathroom with a big hot tub most likely for Heihachi's use only. There was a lot of space under the bed and on the long sofas so Jin could do one of his favourite hobbies, hunting for dust bunnies. And… the most important thing of all… A complete surround sound stereo system hooked up to a wide plasma flat screen TV.

Jin fell in front of it and bowed "Master!"

Kazuya slapped him across the head and then turned to Heihachi "If this is our room then where's our-"

"Stuff?" Heihachi interrupted while inspecting the long drop from the window "It's in the bathroom."

"Good, I want to unpack." Kazuya said making his way to the bathroom.

Heihachi looked confused "Why are you so eager to unpack? I thought you hated this whole idea."

"I do." Kazuya answered bluntly "I just want to give my suits some air."

"Kazuya and his suits, sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S something… something-X!" Jin chanted. He then yelped as Kazuya threw him a menacing stare and he scrambled under the bed.

"There is no time to unpack anyway." Heihachi mumbled.

Kazuya's head popped out of the bathroom, a wide-eyed expression on his face "What? What do you mean NO time to unpack!?"

Jin started whining "That means no time to relax and watch TV!"

"I know… But I've booked us into a…" Heihachi began but broke of hesitantly.

Kazuya approached him "Booked us into what?"

Heihachi hung his head as if in shame "I thought it would be for the best… Us having horrible relationships with each other…"

"Ooh! We're going to Hello Kitty park!?" Jin squealed. He quietened down when he received concerned and scared looks "Oh…" he cleared his throat "Sorry…"

"Well… I decided to book us a father/son group session… The only time I could get was right after we arrived…" Heihachi admitted almost like he was in trouble.

"A bloody father/son group session!? Why!?" Kazuya cried.

"Me and you could use that kind of therapy and so could you and Jin… Perhaps also me and Jin."

Jin laughed out loud "You've been watching Reality TV again! Haven't you!? This has to be a joke! Therapy with this guy!?" he pointed to Kazuya which made him laugh harder.

"Shut up you git." Kazuya replied.

"Don't call me a git! You doodie head!" Jin retaliated.

Kazuya grabbed him by the throat and prepared to punch him repeatedly "You've gotten awfully brave lately. I'll put you back in your place!"

"Ah! What would mommy say!?" Jin said his usual excuse to escape pain.

Kazuya instantly softened and dropped him on the floor "Stupid Jun…"

"See? This is what I am talking about!" Heihachi said now with evidence to prove he was trying to do what was best.

"But we are all Mishimas! We are meant to hate each other's guts! It practically tradition!" Kazuya pleaded.

Jin raised his hand "Um actually, I'm a Kazama."

"I know that but you have Mishima blood in you."

Jin thought for a second "Oh yeah! I do don't I?"

"Yes you do."

Jin smiled "I get it now! So like when a guy and girl do stuff, blood from the guy also goes into the baby thingie… But then why does the baby thingie grow in the girl then? And how does the baby get there? Is it when the-" he started doing gestures with his hands but Kazuya knocked him out cold.

He stood cracking his knuckles and then looked at Heihachi and muttered "We have serious issues, let's go."

They all managed to get down the stairs in their own ways. Kazuya morphed into Devil (against Heihachi's will) and, before either Jin or Heihachi could grab ahold of him to hitch a ride, he dived down and flew to the bottom. Heihachi sighed and had began walking down the stairs but Jin had a great idea. He karate chopped Heihachi in the neck causing him to fall on his stomach and Jin then stood on his back and, keeping his balance, surfed down the stairs. He figured since Heihachi's belly is so big, he won't get hurt… Too much.

"Can I drive? OOOOHHHH Puh-leeeeeez!?" Jin begged on his knees when the three got to the car. He latched onto Heihachi's leg "Please grandpa I love you I love you I LOVE YOU!"

Heihachi saw people beginning to stare "Uh, okay just get off my leg!"

"YAY!" Jin screeched and jumped into the driver's seat.

Kazuya was already in the back and when Heihachi got in and slammed the door he leaned over and said "We are going to die."

"I know" Heihachi agreed.

Jin started banging the horn with his fist and jumped up and down making car noises. "VARROOOMM! VOOM VOOM! BEEP BEEP! MEEP! GET OUT OF THE WAY OLD LADY! OOPS! SORRY ABOUT YOUR DOG!"

"Jin, maybe if you were to put the keys in the ignition…" Kazuya started.

"No, I've had my fun, you can drive again, grandpa!" Jin said seemingly happy and clambered into the back landing in Kazuya's lap. Kazuya pushed him off angrily.

"Oh… Okay?" Heihachi was just as surprised as Kazuya was. He shrugged and climbed into the driver's seat. He started the car but before driving off he turned to Kazuya "Why aren't you sitting in the front?"

Kazuya sighed "Because the author of this story put me in the back."

"Oh yeah."

"… Why can't I drive?" Kazuya asked out of randomness.

"Uh… Because…" Heihachi searched for a reason.

"I have a license… Well an ALMOST legal one anyway. More legal than yours though."

"You can't drive Kazuya because I don't like you." Heihachi said and drove out onto a slip road towards a nearby by town.

"Of course. I forgot about that."

Heihachi parked the car so close to another that everyone had to climb over to the other side to get out.

"Great parking, dad." Kazuya mumbled.

"Shut up." He replied.

They entered a red brick building and walked down a long hallway with pictures of flowers with smiley faces and suns with smiley faces and trees with smiley faces… and smiley faces with smiley faces…

Jin started to cry "Flowers don't smile! I wanna go home!"

Heihachi pulled out a piece of paper with a room number on it "66…" you're wanting to know what the last digit is, aren't you? You think it's going to be 666! It's so freaky about that number because every time I'm playing on a game that you gain experience points on, I get the number 666 quite often and every time I do I get freaked out. Like this one time I had my hair band around my wrist and I got 666 on my gameboy and I thought I saw something freaky on my wrist and I jumped out of my skin and… Yeah… It was freaky.

Jin: I'm bored.

I don't care :P

Heihachi: I hate you.

I don't care.

Kazuya: My fist hurts from punching Jin a few scenes back.

OMG! ARE YOU OKAY BABY! LET ME SEE! AWW! SHIT! HES GOING TO DIE! GET AN AMBULANCE! ILL DO MOUTH TO MOUTH RESUSITATION!

Kazuya: AH! That's unnecessary, I'm sure.

Are you sure, baby?

Kazuya: Yes… And stop calling me baby!

Okay bab- I mean sexy! Is sexy better?

Kazuya: No

How about hottie?

Kazuya: Shut up and get on with this lame ass story!

OKAY! … Hey… My story isn't lame ass starts crying

Kazuya: God… Okay I'm sorry, can we just-

Yay! kisses Kazuya on the cheek

Kazuya: "

On with the story!

Heihachi: Why do me and Jin always get bashed while you worship that dumbass Kazuya?

Jin: Yeah!

First of all, I love you guys I think you're great, second… KAZUYA IS NOT A DUMBASS AND YOU SAY THAT AGAIN SO HELP ME I WILL----

Experiencing some typing malfunctions. Thank you for your patienceMusic starts playing

I'm okay now. Let's just finished this chapter alive, now, shall we?

ahem Anyway, the number on the piece of paper was 667 (too bad fans of that number 666) and it wasn't long before they reached that door. Like opening the gates to hell, Heihachi turned the doorknob and entered.

Suddenly, this short blonde haired woman with a scary smile confronted them with her arms out wide "Hello! Hello! You must be the… Mashma family!" Seeing none of them were going to accept a hug as a greeting, she held out her hand instead.

Heihachi shook it accidentally making it crack "It's Mishima." He said blankly.

Kazuya shook her hand cracking it even more and didn't say a word. Jin shook her hand cracking it again but he nodded and smiled. She looked at her limp hand and regretted shaking hands with the huge muscular family and clutched it close to her chest. She put on a fake smile and asked them to take their seats in a ring of other people.

Kazuya sat to Heihachi's right and Jin next to Kazuya. The people in the circle sat next to a person that they looked quite a lot like. But to Jin, Heihachi and Kazuya, they were all freaks.

The lady took her seat next to Heihachi "Hello everyone. As you know, we have a few new members joining us today so this entire session shall be focused on them as we have made a wonderful breakthrough with most of you and others we are making sufficient progress." She turned to Heihachi "Introducing Heihachi Mishima," Then to Kazuya "Kazuya Mishima," then to Jin "And Jin Kazama."

Everyone smiled and waved. Kazuya kept a stern serious face, Heihachi kept quite but was frightened at the same time and Jin was all smiles and enthusiasm and said Hi back to everyone.

"Heihachi is Kazuya's father and Jin is Kazuya's son but has his mother's last name, Kazama, instead of Mishima." She opened her notebook and looked through "So, Heihachi, starting with you, tell us about yourself."

Heihachi stood "I'm Heihachi Mishima-"

"Hi, Heihachi." Everyone said.

He gulped "I'm the leader of the Mishima Zaibatsu organization-"

"For now…" Kazuya smirked.

He continued "And I have made the effort with the advice of our family therapist to try bonding with my family. Unfortunately, my father could not be here as he is too busy rotting underneath one of my condos called Honmaru." He smiled as if it was perfectly normal and carried on "I booked this session myself because after watching Reality TV I saw that we should try being a better family."

The people clapped and nodded.

The lady smiled "Very Nice, thank you." Heihachi sat down "And now, it's your turn, Kazuya."

Kazuya stood and straightened his purple suit and pulled his gloves tight while talking "I'm Kazuya Mishima-"

"Hello Kazuya." Everyone said.

Kazuya ignored this and carried on "I am very reluctant on being here because I feel no therapy is required for this family because it's in the Mishima blood to have this rivalry and it's natural for us. If we try loving each other, it doesn't feel right. We can not be forced to love," he tightened his glove around his fist making some people gulp and others flinch "This family is meant to be screwed. Grandpa would agree." He sat down.

Several moments passed and the lady looked at the rest of the father's and son's to clap although it was slow and hesitant "Well, that was… Uh… An interesting point of view… Jin, you're up."

Jin stood up in his usual laid-back posture "What's up, I'm Jin Kazama-"

"What's up, Jin?" everyone said.

"Nah, I'm cool, thanks." He shifted his weight onto his other foot and swung his arms thinking of what to say "Um… I'm Kazuya's son and my mother was Jun Kazama. They had a one night stand after being drawn to each other by some mystical mojo and mum then went away, not telling dad she had me in her stomach. Anyway, after she kicked the bucket I came out of hiding to learn the Mishima style of fighting-"

"Can you just talk about what you think about your grandfather's choice in bringing you to this session, we can talk about your life afterwards." The lady said encouraging him to continue.

"Um… I think it sucks!" pleased with himself he sat back leaning back on the chair. As he did so, Kazuya grabbed in leg of the chair and lifted it up causing Jin to fall backwards.

The lady cleared her throat and ignored the chair antics going on at the corner of her eye "Let's learn more about Heihachi's relationship with his son, Kazuya." She nodded to give the cue for Heihachi to start.

"Well, Kazuya was a little welp, and still is, so I was naturally very stern and strict with him."

"That's understandable." The lady nodded. A rise of agreement came from the rest in the circle.

"Well, one day, I found him playing with a girl, this was when he was ten… So, I had had enough of his behaviour and threw him off a cliff and I said, if he was truly my son he would be able to climb back up alive."

Everyone was silent.

The lady then said "Well… Then… Kazuya, how did you feel about-"

"Being thrown into an almost ending abyss at such a young age?" Kazuya asked "Um… It was pretty sucky."

"How did you manage to survive?"

"I survived the fall because I was caught near the bottom by a protruding branch. I hung from it for a day or two. I had prayed to God to help me through things in the past and he had never done anything. But I knew the Devil was real… Oh yes, he's real alright. So I sold my soul to the Devil in exchange for the power to climb back up and seek vengeance."

Not a sound was to be heard apart from a young six year old saying "Cool!"

Kazuya smiled at this and continued "After beating my father in the King of Iron Fist Tournament which he himself organized, I had a short reign of the Mishima Zaibatsu and I threw him off the same cliff he chucked me off all those years ago."

"Yeah but then I beat him in the King of Iron Fist Tournament 2," Heihachi continued the story "Which I didn't organize because I was too busy climbing out of a deep crevasse and I threw him into a volcano hoping to kill him… But he's worse than a cockroach he came back because a company called G Corporation, my financial rival, found his charred remains and resurrected him. So I sent in my Tekken force to… Negotiate-"

"Uh, you mean slaughter everyone, but I kicked their asses anyway? And then, when you saw I was alive you pissed your pants?" Kazuya added, smirking deviously.

Jin laughed "Grandpa peed himself? No surprise there!"

"Well, dumbass (meaning Kazuya) escaped and so, I issued the King of Iron Fist Tournament 3 to lure him into a fight." Heihachi said.

"I only really entered to make my father pay and I heard Jin was in it also. I hated him because I hate everyone… Apart from myself."

"I used Jin as bait when he came to me after some monster had eaten his mother, so when Kazuya was defeated by Jin I shot him in the head."  
"Yeah! That hurt!" Jin mumbled

Heihachi continued "Kazuya escaped. I don't know how Jin survived with a bullet in his brain… Well… He is a Mishima… No surprise I guess. I chained him up and kept him locked away. Well, I found remains of this monster that ate Jin's mother and found, if I could combine it's DNA with my own, I could become immortal… But I had to have the devil gene in order to make the DNA bond… I didn't have the devil gene but Kazuya and Jin did so I opened the King of Iron Fist Tournament 4. I would have taken the devil gene from Jin but Kazuya had the other half… Stupid Kazuya always ruins everything! So when he came, Jin beat him and then would have to face me… I would have won he hadn't cheated and turned into Devil Jin… So… Yeah… He beat me…-"

"WOO! You admit it! Yes! I kick ass!" Jin called out in triumph.

"When Jin was about to kill us both," Kazuya took the story on "He was so wimpy he just flew away like a big baby."

"No! I saw mum. I know she was a pacifist… So I let you guys live… But then the Devil took over as I reached a remote location in the middle of a forest and when I woke up… It was totally destroyed!"

"Just after that dumbass left," Kazuya continued "Me and Heihachi were ambushed by tons of robots…"

"Yeah… So… With immense years of hatred set aside… We fought as father and son." Heihachi admitted "It sorta… Went well. I enjoyed myself."

Kazuya smiled "I did too… Sort of."

"Then why did you betray me and throw me into those dumb robots and fly away leaving me to be blown up as they self-destructed!?" Heihachi cried standing up.

Kazuya stood "Because I want you to die!"

Jin jumped in between both "Yeah well I hate you both and I wish I had killed you!"

"People! People! Calm down" The lady shouted pushing them down in their seats. She cleared her throat, adjusted her glasses and straightened her coat and hair. She sat back down and took a deep breath "Well. Your story is certainly a very in-depth one with lots of emotion and feeling crammed into each on of you. You need to let that out. Show each other you really care. But before we do that, Heihachi, who was you father? You Kazuya and Jin seemed to mention him quite a lot."

"Not me. I didn't know the old coot!" Jin said "In fact… I have barely said anything in this chapter!" He began to cry when a biker-like guy next to him patted him on the shoulder.

"My father is Jinpachi Mishima. He has been locked under Honmaru for ages and is, hopefully, still there despite the explosion with all those robots." Heihachi said.

"I wish he wasn't locked under there. He was like a father to me when I was younger. He was sincere; he was kind, not a stuck-up overly strict beef-head like my father!" Kazuya growled.

Heihachi was about to give Kazuya an earful when the lady interrupted "The thing with the robots happened recently?"

"Yes not too long ago." Heihachi said.

"Last week." Jin added.

She smiled "That's great! We have something fresh for you and Kazuya to work on! That moment of working together to solve a huge problem, minus the betrayal thing, how did that feel?"

Heihachi grunted "It was different… Fun almost."

Kazuya nodded "As much as I am ripping my guts apart in admitting it, I enjoyed myself."

"Look deep down. You and your father both have something inside you waiting to let out. Give your emotions air! Let them free! Let your feelings soar like birds!"

Kazuya and Heihachi looked at each other. Heihachi was about to give his son a hug and Kazuya the same when… They both frowned at each other and growled "Not a chance."

Kazuya stood "Listen, freaky lady, me and my dad hate each other-"

"Hate is a strong word-" she began standing to block his exit.

"No! You are talking a load of bullshit! It's a fact." He turned to the rest of the people in the circle "Live with it, people. Stop trying to change us. We are who we are. If you want to kill your son or if you want to kill your father, then do it! Anyone who disagrees…" He stepped into his fighting stance "Will have to go through me."

The fathers and sons looked at each other and suddenly the whole room erupted into chaos. Fathers bashing sons over the head with chairs, sons hanging from their father's heads, biting hands that tried pulling them off, fathers kicked down their sons as they tried to attack. Sons gave fathers noogies and wedgies. Fathers grabbed their sons in headlocks and started pile driving them into the ground.

The lady's mouth fell open and she just stared at all her progress in father/son psychology go down in flames. As Kazuya left, he closed her mouth and left, Heihachi not far behind, dragging Jin out so he wouldn't join in the action.

As the got outside Jin walked up to Kazuya "That was a pretty inspirational speech, dad…"

It was like a sparkle in Kazuya's eyes but it was actually just the building igniting in flames and Jin received a punch in the face.

Jin clutched his eye "Ah… Point taken…"

Heihachi put an arm around Kazuya, for once, proud of what his son had done. But he saw the look in Kazuya's eyes "Okay, I get it. No sappy dad's stuff." He stopped in mid-hug and punched Kazuya in the side of his face.

He stumbled and then stood. After a few moments, he smiled. Jin caught up holding his eye but jumped around Kazuya and sent his fist crashing into Heihachi's face. After crying out, Heihachi shook his head and patted Jin on the back.

After getting in the car, Kazuya driving, Heihachi in the front seat and Jin laying on the back seats. They all felt happy.

"I don't know about you boys, but I enjoyed myself." Heihachi admitted leaning back in his chair.

"I did!" Jin shouted in an unnecessarily loud voice "Fighitng is what all father/son relationships are about!"

Kazuya nodded "It's a little scary but… For once in my life, I agree with you both."

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Hehe, it would be a good note to end a story on, wouldn't it:P don't worry I've had fun so, hopefully, I won't! Funnier stuff is on the way! I watched Austin Powers before writing this chapter and it had a Father/Son group session and this is where this idea sparked from. Lol the places I get ideas from… don't ask…


	4. Meow?

**Chapter 4**

When the three arrived home from their therapy session and Heihachi beat Kazuya and Jin into accepting the plan for traversing the flights and flights of stairs by letting the two turn into their Devils and carrying him up or down whenever necessary. So, when they sat back to relax that evening, they started to see the faults with their hotel room.

One thing was that the TV wasn't connected. Jin could easily do it himself but Kazuya, unable to sit through PowerPuff Girls, told him that some demonic force possessed the TV and that if he touched it, he would be eaten and then regurgitated by the demon. Jin believed this… No questions asked…

Another was that the walls were paper-thin so they could hear EVERYTHING that was going on. Pipes, toilets flushing, people throwing up, vomit slithering down the tubes in the wall, the occasional rat, people who walked by or were next-door etc.

There was a big leak in the bathroom and they had to be careful in case they slipped. Especially Heihachi. He might've fallen through the floor. That's what Kazuya and Jin thought anyway.

The ceiling had turned a mouldy browny colour because of all the plumbing above the room. In addition to that, the brown shadow had started to creep down one of the walls in the far side of room. Jin was scared it might try and eat him (like the TV) so he covered it with empty suitcases.

Those were the problems they had discovered thus far.

"I need to pee…" Jin mumbled watching the blank TV screen. A shoe suddenly crashed into the back of his head but he scarcely moved. The thrown shoes belonged to Kazuya who was reading a paper and it was about the 25th shoe he had thrown at Jin. He picked up another one so he was ready.

Heihachi was investigating the room for more problems. He went into the little kitchen area of it. He turned the switch for the kettle to turn on… There was a sudden spark at the plug and the plug connected to the kettle turned black and disintegrated into fine dust. Heihachi frowned "I don't think the kettle is going to work…" He looked back at the other appliances he had tried to turn on, all their cables now fine dust on the counter and sighed.

Jin looked down. In his lap he had a pen and paper. On the paper he had noted down everything wrong with the room so far. Accompanying the list were random doodles of badly drawn monsters chewing Kazuya and Heihachi "Okay… Kettle is gay, along with the toaster, coffee machine, bread maker and cheese-toastie maker."

Kazuya let out a whimper. He cleared his throat and straightened his purple suit when the other two gave him weird looks "Just… Uh… I just read that Girls Aloud's new single fell from the top spot to number 2 and I was concerned for Jin… That's all…"

Jin wiped a tear from his eye "I know… Why?" he looked up shaking his fists at the air "WHY!?"

"Shut up, Jin." Heihachi moved on to the oven "Do you think the oven will work?"

Kazuya turned briefly and noticed the oven had a faulty connection and would surely blow his father to bits; He smiled slightly "Try it."

Heihachi grunted and turned the knob. Nothing happened.

Kazuya looked again at the connection and a rat had chewed through the wire and was now laying still, roasted. He sighed and shook his paper to straighten it.

"That's another one, Jin. The oven doesn't work." Heihachi scratched his head "Jin?" he waited a reply "… You got that down?"

Jin sniffed and jumped up "I smell candy!" he ran over to the oven and saw the dead rat. He picked it up and shook it. Burnt fur fell from it. He kept shaking it until it was pink with all its fur gone. He examined it up close, looked in Kazuya's direction and smiled evilly.

"What are you-" Heihachi began in his loud voice but Jin covered his mouth.

"Shhh!" He said. He pointed at the furless rat and then to Kazuya.

Heihachi looked confused and shrugged.

Jin sighed and rubbed his forehead. He emphasized the action and then Heihachi realized what he wanted to do. He nodded and they both crept over to Kazuya who was blissfully unaware. Jin held it up over his head and counted three.

"HAPPY HANUKKAH!" Heihachi shouted causing Kazuya to wince and fall forward, stunned by the volume.

Jin stood still and then realized his grandfather hadn't really understood what the plan was "What the hell!? Grandpa! What do you mean "Happy Hanukkah"!?"

Kazuya stumbled to his feet, straightened his tie and dusted himself off. He seemed casual and then he suddenly burst out "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?" he shouted, chest heaving.

Heihachi, still smiling, announced happily "Jin wants to give this naked mole rat as a gift for Hanukkah!"

Jin and Kazuya stared at him blankly.

"That is not a naked mole rat; it's a normal rat with no fur. In addition to that, 'happy' is not a word to be used while in the confines of this room and neither am I a Jew."

Everyone went quiet. Heihachi was processing the event in his mind. Jin was wondering how many nuts he could fit in his mouth. Kazuya was thinking if he balanced a boulder at a specific place and made Heihachi walk under it so he got squished, would he die? Probably not…

"COME BACK KITTY!" A screechy voice came from outside. Frantic footsteps, two pairs, could be heard. There was a skid, a crash, a clatter and a thud. One set of footsteps could still be heard running. They grew louder until, suddenly, someone crashed through the door and skidded into the far wall.

Jin and Kazuya walked over to see who it was while Heihachi stared at the door, picked up the pen and paper and added it to the list. Then he joined the other two.

The one who had crashed through the door was King. Only momentarily stunned by the collision, King jumped up and looked around searching for his pursuer "I-i-is sh-s-she gone?" he asked, out of breath.

Jin looked down the hallway and saw a knocked over plant pot where the other person had crashed into but they were no where to be seen "Uh… I guess so?"

King stumbled over to the fridge and pulled out a beer.

"Hey! That's my beer!" Heihachi cried.

"Mine too!" Jin protested.

King just sort of looked at them, tilting his head to one side and started guzzling down the beer.

Tears welled up in Jin's eyes "No! I named all those beers! You're drinking Julia! Noooo! Julia! My baby!"

"Alright, kitty-cat, get out. You've had your fun." Kazuya growled.

King let out a burp that made the walls shake. He threw the bottle into the bin and looked at Kazuya with big eyes "Don't kick me out. I need to hide from… Her…" he shuddered.

"The one calling you kitty?" Kazuya asked.

King nodded sadly "She's been after me ever since The King of Iron Fist Tournament 3."

"Who is 'she' exactly?" Heihachi questioned, getting up from cuddling the fridge.

"I am forbidden to say her name. But she is the most annoying, girly, weird freak-like thing you could ever know…" He replied.

"As whacked-out as our author? I find that hard to believe." Kazuya muttered crossing his arms.

"No. If she was that insane, I would be dead by now. And so would you." He pointed to Jin.

Jin looked startled "What? What has your crazy, insane freaky fan gotta do with me?"

"Kitty? Where'd you go? Panda needs a playmate!" The screechy voice came again.

King's pupils dilated and he started shaking "It's her!" He leapt into Heihachi's arms (like on Scooby-doo with Scooby and Shaggy )

The girl came through the door. Dressed in a pink hoodie with the hood down, white arm wraps and pink khakis with white stripes, and with her black hair tied up in two high pony tails, Xiaoyu wandered through the door. She had what looked like a phone on her belt but it was covered in stickers, glitter, charms and hand drawn anime. She saw King "Kitty! There you are, I've been looking all over for you! But that nasty plant pot got in the way…" She then noticed Jin "…" her eyes grew big and she clapped her hands together "JINNY!" she screeched and jumped onto him, knocking him over and she clung to him in a tight hug.

Jin tried lifting his arm to get up but she squeezed the air out of his lungs "H---el----hel---p---mmmeeeeehhhh" was all he could say.

"Jinny?" Kazuya smirked restraining himself from bursting with laughter.

Heihachi dropped King on the floor who landed hard letting out a little growl "I don't what THAT on our vacation!" he shouted inching away.

"Neither do I." Kazuya agreed although he hated it "Things are bad enough as it is without having that little baby tearing around the place."

Xiaoyu stood, pulling Jin up and walked over to Kazuya. She poked his chest as she spoke "I am not a baby! Nor am I little… I'm cute. So there!"

Jin struggled to regain his breath. He turned to Xiaoyu "Look… Baby, you can't be here."

"Why, Jinny?"

Kazuya let out a chuckle but received a lightning fast elbow in the stomach from Xiaoyu, winding him.

"Because this is a family vacation."

"But, when we get married, we'll be family!"

"No, I mean it's family with the same blood."

Xiaoyu frowned in thought and then turned to Kazuya, slightly off-balance because of the elbow incident, and stabbed his arm with one of her nails and was about to suck it when Jin pulled her back.

"Why the hell are you trying to suck blood from my dad?" He said in a casual tone.

She looked into his eyes. Which actually sort of hurt him making him wince "Because then, I'll have blood related to you in me and we'll be family."

"I'm sorry, baby. But it doesn't work like that."

"But why can't I be with you for a little while?" her voice crept up to a higher pitch.

"Because." Was Jin's answer.

"Why?"

"Because."

"Why?"

"Because."

"Why?"

"Because."

"Why?"

"Because."

"Why?"

"…"

"Why?"

"Xiaoyu! Stop it!"

"… Why?"

King had reached the door by now and was about to make an escape when Xiaoyu sensed this and she ran towards him. Before he could run, she grabbed his tail and pulled him back "And kitty is going to stay too!" she looked at King.

He knew what to do and sighed "…Meow…"

Xiaoyu's smile beamed.

Heihachi sighed and looked to Jin who shrugged and then to Kazuya who was rubbing at his temples. He faced Xiaoyu and muttered quietly "Fine… You can stay for a while…"

She screeched in happiness and jumped up and down "That's great! I get to be with Jinny while I searched for Amy."

"Amy?" Kazuya questioned.

"Yeah! He ran away and left me and kitty alone. Then kitty escaped when I arrived here.

King looked over his shoulder "Amy is Armour King."

Heihachi stifled a laugh and Kazuya felt a little frightened at the freakiness of calling Armour King Amy.

Jin shook his head "Well… Xiaoyu… Baby, you won't be able to be with me all the time because this holiday is for me, dad and grandpa to bond. So, like… when we go to the beach or a restaurant or somewhere, you won't be able to be with us every time… Is that okay?"

Xiaoyu, still holding King's tail, mumbled something under her breath and then smiled "Okay!" she looked at King and he knew what the signal meant.

"Meow…"

Chapter 4 I got reviews asking to include one or two more characters. Don't worry people! I'm getting around to that Thanks for the kind words hugz


	5. Problem! PLEASE READ!

Okay, I am sorry to all my reviewers and readers of this story (you come second because you don't review so ure mean but still have a certain level of importance and authority over those who take one look at the story and think "Holy shit, if I read this amazing literature, my brain will explode with the amazing literatureness…")

This reason I am sorry is because me and my family are having SERIOUSSO issues. So much so that my parents are splitting up (not divorcing for a certain reason I am not saying, one wants to divorce the other doesn't, so there but that's not the reason :p) SO my life is kind of rocky and screwed.

I can NOT guarantee ill update too soon. Im having counselling but not because im crazy (don't raise that eyebrow at me!) just so I have support. NO SYMPATHY PLEASE! Otherwise your brains will turn to mush and then ill release worms into your ears so they can eat your mushy brain goo and they will defecate inside your head and you will smell and people will not want to play with a smelly vegetable, will they?

I think I might be away for a month or two. Perhaps when everything is more stable and of a level nature. Who knows! I might turn over a new leaf tomorrow and update with one million chapters! THIS IS NOT GUARANTEED I REMIND UUUUUU! Im saying this so you can understand the randomness of the time I might update, even thought it might not be much anyway.

I really want to continue this story because it is so much fun and I am willing to bring in other characters (BRYAN!!!! BRYAN!!!!!!!!! ahem) and I will take suggestions on ideas and characters you might wish to have in the story. You can PM me ANY time thought you might not get a reply for ages DO NOT BE DETERED! Ill give a reason if I do not wish for a certain character to be brought in. it might be because I don't like that character because they always kick my ass on Tekken Dark Resurrection in the Dojo level hard mentioning no names e.g Eddie, Christie…. But if ya gimme a good reason and idea along with that character then I might reconsider! Another reason maybe I have no idea about that character or much at all. Remember, this sotry is random…

RANDOMFLEXIBLE

Remember that equation, my children.

I feel better already! So, I'll try being around. Please understand everyone! thank you!


	6. Who wants babies?

**Chapter 5**

"This will be the best vacation ever!" Xiaoyu smiled as she caressed King on her lap while he worked on devouring his next beer.

"You won't be here for too long will you?" Heihachi asked, sitting in Kazuya's armchair. Kazuya went over to him and kicked him in the shin causing him to cry out and fall forwards leaving the chair free.

"What about Amy, though? We can't leave her out in the mean cold city, can we? I want her and Kitty to have babies!"

King's eyes widened and he broke out in a sweat. He turned to Jin who was sitting next to Xiaoyu on the floor and begged "Help me!"

Jin's reaction was simply petting him on the head "I'm sure they'll be a lovely family." He said to Xiaoyu while grinning evilly at King.

Kazuya had a deal with Jin that the TV was allowed on as long as PowerPuff Girls were avoided so Jin settled with watching HiHi Puffy Ami Yumi instead, much to Xiaoyu's delight. Heihachi managed to rip the paper from Kazuya for now, leaving him to look in the hotel brochure for stuff they could do or restaurants they could go out to that evening.

"Anything in the paper?" Jin asked "About Girls Aloud, that is."

Heihachi frowned and flicked the page "No." he suddenly did a double take at a headline. He leaned back, confused almost but then he chuckled to himself "Well, looks like your great grandfather is still kicking, Jin."

"What?" Jin stood up and looked over Heihachi's shoulder. Kazuya was quicker however and snatched the paper and re-read it over and over.

"Grandpa?" Kazuya muttered in disbelief.

The headline read **!!!HONMARU GO EXPLODY!!!** And, of course, that's where Heihachi imprisoned his father, Jinpachi Mishima. Shortly after Kazuya was six-years old. Kazuya was more secure with his grandfather because he wasn't driven so hard and be given stupidly high expectations.

"What do we care? The old dog shouldn't even be able to leave the Honmaru premises, let alone come and try and kill us." Jin said and sat back with Xiaoyu.

Kazuya kicked him in the leg "You do not speak of Jinpachi in that manner."

Heihachi laughed "Getting a little soft are we, Kazuya?"

Kazuya glared at him and stomped off to the bathroom, grabbing his training stuff along the way.

"So, Jinny… You don't know your great grandfather?" Xiaoyu asked, feeding Kind kitty biscuits.

"No. I know he must be old though. If my grandpa is 60+ I'd hate to hear what his old man is."

Heihachi sighed "I'm still sexy."

Kazuya heard this as he came out, shirt off (OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XP) and he sneezed loudly. Heihachi looked at him and Kazuya said "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." He dodged a thrown glass and walked over to the window.

Xiaoyu stood up and joined him "What are you doing?"

Kazuya, slightly scared by Xiaoyu's sudden interested in his activities replied quietly while opening the window and laying one of his white shirts out "I left this shirt in the bathroom and Jin accidentally missed when he went to the toilet so I washed it a while ago and I'm letting it air out here since…" he turned and spoke the last part of his explanation loudly so Heihachi would hear "We do not have a washing machine OR a dryer!"

"I though some hotels did laundry." Xiaoyu suggested.

"This one does. It's just… If something goes in, it comes back out with black sticky stuff all over it. Apparently, the hotel staff say it's perfectly clean. But I swear I saw Heihachi's socks move across the floor… I can't say I'm surprised but… You never know."

"Oh, okay." Xiaoyu suddenly pushed Kazuya out of the window.

Jin looked over "Um… Why did… Nevermind." He lifted his arm up and invitied Xiaoyu for a hug. She jumped across the room landing on him heavily and nearly giving him a concussion.

King had made it closer to the door for escape and had almost reached it when it suddenly flung open, whacking him aside. Kazuya burst through, covered in smallish bloody cuts, he had a blackened eye, lacerations on his face, his trousers were shredded and a part of his right ear had been bitten. He limped over towards Jin and Xiaoyu and hovered high above them.

Jin looked up, smiled and then rested his head back on Xiaoyu's while watching the season finale of Spiderman.

Heihachi looked up from behind the kitchen counter (he was being a piggy wiggy again) "Back so soon?"

"Unfortunately, yes. As I plummeted down through the clouds, I was attacked by five bald eagles. I managed to grab onto one of the 65th floor windows and I crawled back in. However, what awaited me there, but a pack of rabid Jack Russel Terriers. On their collars were the big words "From Mianus". I managed to run all the way back up here only to trip over an Albino Rock Python and flat onto a bunch of black mambas. The dogs jumped on me and I was being mauled. In addition, that stupid Pikachu appeared again and grabbed onto my face. I managed to stand and run blindly the rest of the way here. The Pikachu dropped from my face as I bashed my head repeatedly against a metal pole."

Heihachi's head popped back up "Sorry, were you talking to me?"

Kazuya growled and started moving towards the kitchen to grab a brandy-topped cognac when he tripped over King on the floor who was unconscious after being hit in the face by the door.

"Xiaoyu waled over to him and crouched beside him "So, in total, you have been attacked by bald eagles, mauled by dogs from you're anus-"

"Xiaoyu, baby, Mianus is a place in north America." Jin corrected.

"Oh, so you've been attacked by bald eagles, mauled by dogs from Mianus," she let out a chuckle at the thought "bitten repetedly by venomous snakes after tripping over an albino rock python and then your face was latched onto by a Pikachu?"

Kazuya uttered a moan, still face down on the floor.

"All in the course of two minutes?"

He lifted his head "Pretty much."

Jin pulled him up, leaving King free to scramble away "Why didn't you fight or turn into Devil?"

"I tried, but it didn't work." He grabbed a teacloth and wetted it and dabbed over his cuts "I haven't been able to since getting back from that father-son group session. I remember having to fly Heihachi's fat bulk up to this room… I bumped into some girl who was running across the landing… And that was it."

"Who was it?"

"It was Asuka!" Xiaoyu said "Asuka Kazama. She is the vice-manager person of this hotel but she never does any work."

"Is she a friend of yours?" Jin asked "You said you wouldn't bring anyone else to stay here!"

"No no, Jinny!... I know because Julia told me." She smiled "She's my BEST friend! She'll be here soon."

"My beer? But King drank her…" Jin sighed.

"Who's King?"

"Oh, I mean Kitty."

Xiaoyu gasped "Oh!" She turned to King "Bad kitty! You do NOT drink my friends!"

Heihachi popped up from the kitchen cleaning some glasses "Asuka… Kazama?" Jin and Heihachi turned to Kazuya.

"What?" He asked.

"Kazama. Same last name as Jin." Heihachi said.

"I don't know her."

"But didn't you…" Heihachi tried doing 'that' action with his hands "With someone who's last name was Kazama?"

Kazuya swatted his father's hands down "Don't do that!" he turned red.

"No. Mum's name wasn't Asuka, it was Jun." Jin corrected. He then smiled "WOW! I HAVE A COUSIN! Finally! Someone in this family who is a GIRL and is alive! God, I thought this family was genetically unable to have girls in it."

Heihachi froze "Wait, did that little brat say she has her best friend coming here!?"

Xiaoyu looked sad "No… Because Kitty drank her!"

King shrugged.

A knock came from the door "Hello? I'm looking for Xiaoyu. Is this her room?"

Xiaoyu jumped up "Julia!" Jin covered her mouth and Heihachi answered the door.

"Uh… Nobody lives here. Try room number 78!"

Julia paused and looked at the door number "This is number 78."

Heihachi saw this and cursed under his breath "Oh well… Uh… Nobody lives here anyway, goodbye!" As he shut the door Xiaoyu broke free from Jin and Kazuya's grasp and pushed Heihachi out of the way.

"Hello Julia!" She screamed.

Both girls screeched in high pitched voices, almost beyond hearing level. The gave each other hugs and Xiaoyu made King pull in her suitcases.

"This must be Jin!" Julia said, looking at him "You were right Xiaoyu! His hair _does_ look like the perfect place for my pet seagull to nest!"

Jin smiled then realized what she said "What!?"

She opened up one of the suitcases and a white seagull burst out flapping madly, made a dive towards Jin, and landed in his hair "AAAAHHHHH! GET IT OFF!" He started pulling at it as it pecked his head and then ran around, using various things to try to pry the gull off.

"Aww. I think he likes you, Jinny!" Xiaoyu said. She then made a job of introducing everyone to Julia "Okay, this is Jin's scary daddy called Kazuya. He has bushy eyebrows and freaky eyes, one red and one normal." She moved onto Heihachi "And this is Heihachi. My Jinny's beefheaded Grandpa! Make sure he doesn't sit on you, otherwise you might never see the light of day again!" Heihachi sniffed sadly and Kazuya snarled walking off to clean himself up.

Julia smiled and called after them "Nice meeting you!"

Jin continued running around in the background.

"So, you're boyfriend brought you out here for a vacation, right?" Julia asked taking the offered orange juice from Xiaoyu.

"Yep! Isn't he the best?"

Julia nodded but then leaned close to whisper "But why did he bring his family?"

"Well… Actually… He and his family came out here to bond or something and I just happened to find them here! Thanks to Kitty!" She pulled King close and hugged him tightly.

Julia looked surprised "I have the perfect playmate for him!" she wondered into the hall and came back, pulling Armor King by his tail "She is called Starbright and is such a sweet kitty. I'm sure she and Kitty will get along nicely!"

King and Armor King, with his cute pink bonnet, looked at each other with desperation.

Xiaoyu let out a half-hearted chuckle "Strange because I lost one of my kitties called Amy not too long ago… And she looks exactly like that!"

Julia smiled "What a coincidence! I found Starbright a while ago in the carpark! We instantly established a bond tighter than ever!"

"Hehe… What you don't understand is, Julia… That's my Amy!" Xiaoyu pointed at Armor King.

Julia raised an eyebrow "N-no… It's my Starbright!"

"You and Amy couldn't have established a bond because Amy is MY kitty and she is going to have babies with Kitty!"

Armor King let out a mournful howl as did King.

"She is NOT called Amy. She's called Starbright!" Julia started getting frustrated.

"She's called Amy!" Xiaoyu started pulling on Armor King's tail.

"Starbright!"

"Amy!"

"Xiaoyu!" Jin called having gotten the gull off.

"Jin!" Xiaoyu screeched, wanting him to leave her to fight.

"Kazuya!" Jin called for help as he tried pulling Xiaoyu away.

"Starbright!"

"Amy!"

"KAZUYA!" Jin called again.

"Xiaoyu?" Heihachi came towards the fight only to be knocked in the head by Julia's elbow.

"Julia!" he shouted angrily.

"Heihachi?" Jin questioned as his grandpa started pulling from the middle.

"Jin?" Xiaoyu was confused when Jin let go and started pulling Heihachi away.

"STARBRIGHT!"

"AMY!"

"JIN!"

"HEIHACHI!"

Kazuya walked past only giving a brief glance to the struggle that was going on and sat down in an armchair directly in front of and facing the fight. He sipped his brand-topped cognac.

King jumped into the middle and roared loudly, shaking the hotel and causing dust to float down from the ceiling.

Everyone stopped and let go of Armor King's now 10 ft long tail, who then dropped to the floor.

"Kitty! Don't yell like that! There is no need to be so noisy!" Xiaoyu scolded him.

"Come, Starbright, let's leave this horrible place with this stupid people!" Julia announced and picked Armor King up by the pink collar around his neck and dragged him through the door.

"NOOOO!" Xiaoyu grabbed a hold of Armor King's legs "I won't let her take you, Amy!"

"Xiaoyu! Stop it!" Jin cried.

"JULIA!!!!!!!!!!!!" A voice cried from nearby.

Julia's pupils dilated. She dropped Armor King, causing Xiaoyu and Jin to fly back "Oh no." She looked around.

Thudding footsteps became apparent. Kazuya and Heihachi stepped onto the landing to see how the event would end and how it could get even more random.

"JULIA! I AM HERE!" Ganryu came charging up the stairs and towards Julia.

Julia whimpered and looked at Xiaoyu (in Jin's arms on the floor) and then back again. She started to sweat "You know what? Keep him!" She ran and jumped over the banister of the stairs and landed on the floor below and started to run "See ya, Xiaoyu!"

Xiaoyu hopped over and waved to her "Until next time, Julia!"

Ganryu slowed, panting madly "Ju-julia…"

Heihachi pointed in the direction she had gone.

He moaned loudly, started to lumber down the stairs again, tripped, and began rolling.  
After a crash and screams of horror, silence fell among the top floor.

Xiaoyu grabbed Armor King and cuddled him tightly "AMY!!! NOW YOU AND KITTY CAN HAVE BABIES!"

Kazuya mumbled something under his breath and returned to touch up his wounds.

"My girlfriend's one of a kind, eh?" Jin stated proudly to Heihachi.

Heihachi folded his arms and simply said "Banarnars."

Another chappie so soon? O.o woah, im amazing! XP I took in the comment on someone wanting a little of Julia in this bit. She'll probably return later! Next, hopefully I'll make room for someone Im really getting into! not becuz he's an insane cyborg with huge muscles…. Because he'd be a great James bond villain!


	7. A Rival Returns

**Chapter 6**

It was around 5pm and everyone was getting ready to go out at around half past. Mostly because of Heihachi's need for a good sushi bar. They planned to leave King and Armor King locked up nice and safe in the hotel room and, as Xiaoyu put it, "Time for them to start Getting it on."

"Jin! Wear this!" Xiaoyu held up a bright yellow Jacket complete with neon green trousers.

Jin nearly had a heart attack "Woah! Xiaoyu, honey, I really don't think it's a good idea to…"

"…"

"Xiaoyu?"

"…"

Jin scratched his head "Xiaoyu… Are you okay?"

She started turning blue.

He realized she had started to hold her breath "Jeez! Um… I don't think I'd look good in an outfit like that, munchkin… Could you stop that? Please?... Really… Stop it now! Xiaoyu!... AHHH! ALRIGHT ALREADY! ILL WEAR THE STUPID OUTFIT!!!!"

Xiaoyu suddenly recovered like nothing had happened "Okay!" she handed it to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek "You'll look great!" she smiled and skipped off to choose what she was going to wear.

Jin looked at the outfit "Yeah…" he mumbled and walked over to the bathroom. He knocked "Heihachi! Open up!"

The door opened partially "What!?" came Heihachi's voice.

"You've been in their one WHOLE minute!"

"… So?"

Jin looked dumbstruck "So!? What do you mean "So?"!? JESUS CHRIST! HOG THE BLOODY BATHROOM ALL NIGHT THEN! HOW SLEFISH CAN YOU GET!?"

Suddenly Heihachi's fist burst through the small door opening sending Jin flying into the wall opposite. He closed it with a bang but not before saying "It's pronounced Selfish, not Slefish!"

Xiaoyu hopped over to Jin who lay unconscious on the floor and shook her head "Oh, Jinny. You'll never be ready at this rate!" a smile spread across her face "I'll have to get you ready myself!" She dragged his body behind an open closet door and started.

Kazuya just started to have a migraine "… What fking suit should I wear!?" he cried loudly. He walked up and down along his section of the wardrobe.

Heihachi emerged from the bathroom in a smart looking tuxedo "Ooh, someone's getting ratty."

"I have a fking migraine… Why wouldn't I be fking ratty!? Now what the fk should I wear!?" Kazuya snapped angrily.

Heihachi sighed, knowing Kazuya was going to be like this until tomorrow. He started fiddling with his red bowtie "Where the purple suit you adore so much. You have over 20 in that closet."

"I always fking wear fking purple. It's like my fking trademark! Stupid King of Iron Fist Tournament 2! Stupid Namco! Stupid fans! Stupid Fighting! Stupid Devil Gene! Stupid Dad! Stupid son! Stupid-"

"Enough with the stupid!" Heihachi bellowed "Where the white outfit then."

"No."

"Why?"

"Just no!"

"Alright!"

"… Fine."

"What?"

"I'll wear the white outfit!"

"Okay, wear it then."

"I said no!"

"Bloody hell!" Heihachi shouted "Just wear the red one then!"

Kazuya raised an eyebrow and disappeared into the racks of clothes he had brought. A little while later, he emerged with the white suit with golden embroidery "I'll wear white."

After everyone was ready, Xiaoyu in a purple tank top and blue chequered skirt, Jin in his clothes which looked to have been recently electrified, Heihachi in his smartish tuxedo and Kazuya in his sexy white suit with golden embroidery which really shows off his muscles, especially since the trousers are tight and- Ahem. Sorry. Anyway, yeah, so everyone was ready and had used Jin and Kazuya to fly quickly down the endless stairs (influence of his bump into Asuka Kazama wore off). They were now in the car, Kazuya driving.

"One WHOLE minute." Jin muttered, arms folded in the back "One whole bloody minute!"

Heihachi sighed "Alright, neon, we get it."

Jin ignored the remark on his clothing and a minute later… "One whole minute!"

Kazuya's grip tightened on the steering wheel.

"Shut it." Heihachi noticed Kazuya's anger building "For your own good."

"But was it really necessary to waste so much precious time in the bathroom?"

"SHUT UP JIN OTHERWISE ILL RIP OUT YOUR INTESTINES, STRANGLE YOU WITH THEM AND THEN CONTINUOUSLY FLICK YOUR FKING LOVESPUDS WITH A WET TOWEL!!" Kazuya burst out in an angry rage.

Jin whimpered and shrunk in his seat.

Kazuya cricked his neck and cleared his throat "As you may have already noticed I am in a severely pissed off mood and do not wish to be pissed off in anyway at this present moment in time. I appreciate your cooperation… AND BY THE GATES OF HELL IF YOU DO NOT ABIDE BY MY TERMS YOU SHALL BE SIX-FEET UNDERGROUND WITH A PICKAXE THROUGH YOUR HEAD BEFORE YOU CAN SAY "Shit. I have a pickaxe through my head."… Understood?"

Kazuya's glare reflected painfully in the rear-view mirror and Jin nodded, scared out of his skin.

Xiaoyu turned from the window and leaned on Kazuya's chair "What did you say, Kazuya? I wasn't listening."

Kazuya's left eye twitched but he did nothing more.

Shortly after the lovespud incident, they arrived at a beautiful restaurant called "Le Pouvoir". Apparently, the French people owning the restaurant were Italian and thought that it sounded good despite the fact that in French it meant "The To Be Able To." Also, this is partially due to my laziness in writing even though I am alright at French I like the sound. No one can defy my logic. If you do, you'll be out into a chapter and nasty things will happen to you. Have a nice day.

The entered after Kazuya had a row with the receptionist with no reason behind it and sat at a table towards the centre of the restaurant. The lights were perfectly dimmed not so you couldn't see but to emit a comfortable aura. The sound of idle chatter was the only sound, accompanied by two violinists and a cellist on stage. It was a pretty full up place and Jin's outfit received plenty of looks.

"Isn't this place romantic, Jinny?" Xiaoyu said dreamily as she hugged Jin's arm.

Kazuya waved over a waiter "I'll have a vodka."

"Sì, signore." He wrote it down in a notebook.

Heihachi grunted "What about us?"

Kazuya sighed "Dr. Pepper for Beefhead, fruit juice for the whiny brat and diet coke for the Happy Flasher."

Insulted the three folded their arms and glared at Kazuya.

He mumbled "I feel like fking st. Get stuffed."

"Is that it, signore? Just drinks for now?" The waiter asked, wanting to leave as soon as possible.

"Yeah, for now-" Kazuya started.

"I'll have the Steak Diane followed by Tortellini Chicken and Cream Sherry, Mushroom & Asiago Farfalle… For starters." Heihachi announced after a quick breeze through the menu. The waiter struggled to write it all down.

"Spaghetti Bolognaise for me, all the way!" Xiaoyu smiled.

"Yeah, and I'll have Pork with Fennel and Carrots, thanks."

Kazuya looked around the table and sighed "And Leek Risotto for me."

"sì, il vostro alimento sarà qui presto." The waiter walked away almost relieved.

"Yeah, whatever." Kazuya mumbled.

"Lighten up, Kazuya." Heihachi said "Enjoy yourself."

"I have a fking migraine. I'm too busy enjoying that." He replied.

People looked back from tables around them. One seated an Italian man and his daughter. An English woman served them "What would you like, sir?"

He looked up and tried his best to speak without an Italian accent but it was very strong "I would like toast." However the waitress found it hard to understand and she had been having a very bad day.

"Pardon, me, sir?"

"Toast."

"Come, again?"

"Toast!"

"Oh, alright sir, how many pieces?"

"I want two piece on my plate." However, this sounded like "I want to piss on my plate."  
Well, the waitress just about had it "What!? You don't piss on your plate you son of a bitch!" She walked off in a huff and another English waiter came to take her place only he was male.

"I'm so sorry, sir. Please accept our apologies! Your toast will be ready soon."

The Italian man sighed and then saw he and his daughter didn't have a fork. He tunred to the waiter and said "I want two fork." This sounded like "I want to fu-"

"What a lovely evening!" Xiaoyu said cuddling up to Jin.

"Hehe… Baby can you… Let go?" Jin murmured.

"Why?" Xiaoyu looked hurt.

"Pain."

"Huh?"

Jin sighed not wanting to talk because of his pain "Tight suit, around groin, equals pain."

"Oh!" Xiaoyu smiled "Isn't that cute?"

"What?" Heihachi turned from the breadbasket.

"Jin's having growing pains in his groin!"

Jin's pupils dilated and he looked at Xiaoyu in shock "Xiaoyu!? WTF!?"

Well, the food arrived and everyone stayed quiet, not wanting to make the outing any worse than it already was. Jin's groinal pains, Xiaoyu's loudness, Kazuya's pissed off…ness and being next to that Italian guy. Things were starting to level out until…

"I hope Kitty and Amy are trying for babies!" Xiaoyu said loudly. Kazuya dropped his fork and leaned back in his chair while Heihachi paused but then continued shoveling.

"I don't think we should talk about that kind of thing in a restaurant, baby." Jin stated.

"Sorry, Jinny. But I hope a sexual relationship of some kind starts between those two!"

----- Back at the hotel room -----

"Hey, King, chuck us over another beer, would ya? TNA is coming back on." Armor King sat outstretched on the sofa in front of the wide screen TV.

King was raiding the fridge with an armful of beer. He stood and kicked it shut and threw a beer to Armor King who caught it in mid-air without looking. He leaned forward and popped the top on the edge of the glass table infront of the sofa.

King sat down on Armor King's tail as he tried to move and he let out a snarl. But the two were too full on beer to start a fight.

"I wonder why that Xiaoyu kid thinks we're cats." King asked through a burp.

Armor King shrugged "Deluded."

"Probably."

A minute passed and Armor King grabbed the remote "Wanna watch Power Rangers?"

"No. I want to watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles."

"Rock paper scissors?" He suggested.

King thought for a sec and nodded.

The two stood and counted to three. King chose paper. Armor King chose Rock. Which is why King landed on the floor.

"I chose paper…" He mumbled in his disorientated state, the thrown rock by his head.

"Yeah. I chose rock." Armor King started guzzling down another beer as the Power Rangers started.

----- Restaurant -----

Jin, Heihachi and Xiaoyu were enjoying themselves while sharing jokes and having a laugh and Kazuya was… Well… Kazuya.

"God I'm bored…" He muttered to himself. His gaze wondered over to the bar on the right hand side and he saw something very peculiar. He sat up and looked harder. The man he seemed to recognize came closer and walked past. It was then that Kazuya realized who it was "Bryan Fury?" he inquired as the guy walked past.

He stopped and came closer to the table "Kazuya Mishima? Didn't think I'd be seeing you anytime soon."

Kazuya stood and the two shook hands "Take a seat."

Bryan grabbed a random guy's seat as he was about to sit down and took it for himself.

Jin suddenly realized who had joined them at the table and flipped out "AAHH!" he screeched and jumped back out of his chair.

"Jinny? What's wrong?" Xiaoyu asked.

Jin crouched down and pointed at Bryan "It's… The man…"

Heihachi looked from Bryan to Jin "Well it's not a fking penguin, is it?"

"It's the man who tried to eat my head!" Jin squeaked. Xiaoyu brought him back to the table and rocked him in her arms while he shook uncontrollable.

Kazuya remembered the story he told Jin about a man with white hair, scary muscles, and who was half cyborg who had tried to eat Jin's head when he was sleeping last Halloween. Jin believed this unsurprisingly "No. You're thinking of something else. He's Bryan Fury, my arch Rival."

Jin relaxed "Phew. I thought I was going to die! Really! OMG!"

"Arch Rival?" Heihachi asked.

"Yeah, We've been trying to spill each other's guts out for a while." Bryan said.

"I was so scared that I actually thought he was going to eat my head!" Jin continued, interrupting Bryan.

"And just because we're arch rivals bent on destroying everything the other has in their spiritual existence, doesn't mean we can't act civilized now and then." He continued.

"Just like the time milk came out of my nose when Heihachi yelled OMG! JIN YOU'RE HAVING A HEART ATTACK!!!" Jin interrupted again.

"Bryan knows Jin too." Kazuya mentioned.

"Yeah, back when he fought in the King of Iron Fist Tournament 3-" Bryan started.

"It was so wild I was admitted to hospital for severe shock!" Jin yet again interrupted.

"And he doesn't seem to be any different." Bryan tightened his grip on a napkin he was holding and a vein appeared in his temple.

"Also, there was this one time-" Jin started.

"DAMMIT JIN! CALM THE FK DOWN!" Bryan shouted. Veins pulsating in his neck.

Jin went quiet, although unphased by the outburst. The whole restaurant looked over and security hustled the group out.

After being thrown outside Kazuya put his hand on Bryan shoulder and said "Bryan, You haven't changed a bit."

Yay! Bryan! dies I'm using the F word in this chapter :o but there are pretty stars to make the words look prettier! Remember if you want a character to pop, gimme a PM about it and if you'd like it short term (one chapter or less) or long term (two to three chapters) But managing characters is difficult… :p


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